March has been a month of waiting.

I think I expect spring to whizz and pop into abundant life the very moment the 1st of March lands.  And there has been lots of new colour and plenty of signs of spring (and finally some proper sunshine in the past few days!), but there’s also plenty of grey, damp and leafless around still.  March makes me impatient.  Add to that being 38 weeks pregnant with the promise/threat of a baby arriving anytime, and you get an restless Hannah.  I’m trying not to be too fidgety and uneasy, though, and to enjoy these last weeks of being a family-of-three with baby tucked up safely inside.

The end of pregnancy is both lovely and incredibly vulnerable.  I can remember, after two miscarriages, it being a dream to make it to my booking-in appointment at 9 weeks pregnant.  Today I am 38 weeks.  I can’t believe I’ve made it this far, that my body has done this, that all seems well.  Yet, baby isn’t here yet.  She isn’t safely in our arms.  We are walking that terrible tightrope in between life and tragedy. There are drawers of tiny baby clothes in the cabinet, there’s a moses basket set up in our bedroom, but baby is still in that other-womb-world.  Most likely, all will be well, but I feel like I can’t settle.  

One of the nicest things about expecting a spring baby is that there’s a natural countdown provided by the flowering of the spring bulbs.  First we had the snowdrops, and then the end of February and beginning of March brought glorious displays of crocuses.  The recent sunshine over the past few days has made the daffodils break into joyful yellow splendour, and the grape hyacinths (my favourites) will add their dusky blue-purples to the flowerbeds any day now.  When I was expecting the Piglet, I had to wait right until the bluebells were in full flower before I got to meet my boy.  The wait shouldn’t be so long for this little one.

Piglet has kept us busy and entertained this month.  Here’s a little snapshot of some of our moments:

• a loud buzz of solitary bees on crocuses at the Hirsel at the beginning of the month.  An unmistakable sound of spring.
• sandy toes, toasting marshmallows on the beach at Coldingham, potty on the sand, bare knees out watching the gulls go by
• crunching fresh greens underfoot in the woodland releasing their leeky, garlicky smells
• a dipper peeping as it flies past us down the river
• yellow gorse flowers providing welcome colour
• snack time at Wildlife Club on a fallen down tree covered in bracket fungi in a hundred different colours
• looking inside hollow hogweed stems for larvae and overwintering critters
• vibrant rainbows above the courtyard
• splashing in the river
• minnows in the shallows
• spotted a red kite above Gattonside – my first ever central Borders red kite sighting
• a brown hare in a ploughed field in the morning sunshine
• two oystercatchers attacking a hovering drone

Life in abundance!